One of my friends recently sent me an email to read her blog, and on her blog it said she was leaving the LDS church. I have been wondering how to respond, if she wants my response (she did after all just email me to look at her blog, she choose not to tell me herself – so I am not sure if she is interested in my opinions), and what exactly my feelings are about the situation are. I thought this gave me a chance to bear my testimony, so here it goes...
First, I love a person no matter what they believe. I have many friends from a wide variety of backgrounds, a wide variety of lifestyles, a wide variety of beliefs. I would like to think that they know that regardless of their personal choices, I accept them and love them although I might not love or agree with everything they do. That is not my call, they have to be ok with their life. They will be accountable for their choices, not me.
Second, I have thought in the past, how much easier things would be if I wasn’t part of the church. I have considered choosing a relationship over my beliefs. Putting aside my upbringing and being more open to different ways of life, to be more ‘worldly’ and have less argument and discord in my relationship with Jadyn’s dad.
Third, there is something I know that keeps me from doing that. I have read the Book of Mormon and I have prayed about the Book of Mormon, and I have a testimony of the Book of Mormon. There are many people and churches that believe that Jesus Christ is our Savior. I believe that too, with everything I am, but there is only one church that has the restored gospel, that has the Book of Mormon. That is the LDS church. I cannot deny that I have received a testimony. And I knew I could not live with myself if I made that kind of compromise.
My hope is that when my friend was choosing to be baptized, she wasn’t doing it to please me, but she was doing it because she had a testimony – that she believed that the Book of Mormon is the word of God. Had she not been baptized I would have loved her with the same strength and fervor that I do today. She is my sister regardless. And now all these years later I wonder, Why? Sometimes, being a member of the church is hard. It is hard if two people in a relationship believe in different things, I know I would have never been happy compromising myself. I didn’t take the sacrament for 5 years. I was starving myself from my relationship with my Savior. I knew what was right, I knew I wasn’t living like I needed to, and it is a daily effort to put off the things of the world and embrace what I know is right.
I wish her happiness in her choices, that she can find the peace she is looking for. I know personally the only way I feel that peace is when I am living the gospel. My thoughts for investigators of the church - if you do not have a testimony of the Book of Mormon, then don’t get baptized. You need that testimony to help you be strong in your faith. To keep connected and not leave the church. That testimony is what has kept me connected even in the dark times, and I am grateful everyday that the Holy Ghost bears witness of the truth and that I was able to receive that testimony. I challenge anyone – if you don’t know, or if you have ever wondered – read the Book of Mormon and pray. You will receive an answer. And that answer is what keeps me from talking myself out of my faith. I know, and I know that God knows that I know – the Book of Mormon is the word of God.
First, I love a person no matter what they believe. I have many friends from a wide variety of backgrounds, a wide variety of lifestyles, a wide variety of beliefs. I would like to think that they know that regardless of their personal choices, I accept them and love them although I might not love or agree with everything they do. That is not my call, they have to be ok with their life. They will be accountable for their choices, not me.
Second, I have thought in the past, how much easier things would be if I wasn’t part of the church. I have considered choosing a relationship over my beliefs. Putting aside my upbringing and being more open to different ways of life, to be more ‘worldly’ and have less argument and discord in my relationship with Jadyn’s dad.
Third, there is something I know that keeps me from doing that. I have read the Book of Mormon and I have prayed about the Book of Mormon, and I have a testimony of the Book of Mormon. There are many people and churches that believe that Jesus Christ is our Savior. I believe that too, with everything I am, but there is only one church that has the restored gospel, that has the Book of Mormon. That is the LDS church. I cannot deny that I have received a testimony. And I knew I could not live with myself if I made that kind of compromise.
My hope is that when my friend was choosing to be baptized, she wasn’t doing it to please me, but she was doing it because she had a testimony – that she believed that the Book of Mormon is the word of God. Had she not been baptized I would have loved her with the same strength and fervor that I do today. She is my sister regardless. And now all these years later I wonder, Why? Sometimes, being a member of the church is hard. It is hard if two people in a relationship believe in different things, I know I would have never been happy compromising myself. I didn’t take the sacrament for 5 years. I was starving myself from my relationship with my Savior. I knew what was right, I knew I wasn’t living like I needed to, and it is a daily effort to put off the things of the world and embrace what I know is right.
I wish her happiness in her choices, that she can find the peace she is looking for. I know personally the only way I feel that peace is when I am living the gospel. My thoughts for investigators of the church - if you do not have a testimony of the Book of Mormon, then don’t get baptized. You need that testimony to help you be strong in your faith. To keep connected and not leave the church. That testimony is what has kept me connected even in the dark times, and I am grateful everyday that the Holy Ghost bears witness of the truth and that I was able to receive that testimony. I challenge anyone – if you don’t know, or if you have ever wondered – read the Book of Mormon and pray. You will receive an answer. And that answer is what keeps me from talking myself out of my faith. I know, and I know that God knows that I know – the Book of Mormon is the word of God.
Amy, I love you the same as I did that day. I love you no matter what choices you make, I love you when you doubt yourself, I love you when you remember that you love yourself as much as everyone else loves you, I love you as my sister. I will always love you, and I pray from the bottom of my heart that this is going to bring you the peace you are always looking for. That is all I ever want for you. To love yourself as much as you are loved and too be comfortable being who you are - my very precious Amy.
3 comments:
I love you too! Thanks for your sweet, but stern message to me!!!
You are right about how you shouldn't get baptized unless you have a testimony. I found comfort in the family values and the morals...I wouldn't change that part of my life for anything...I have the best husband ever, good friends that have changed my life, and a daughter! I am at peace and I also believe life shouldn't be so hard! It should be as simple (not easy...since I know plenty of people who struggle with the thought of having a savior) as believing he died for us.
I think that is all I have tonight...just know I love you and that I did try to call you and tell you!
That is a very good post.
aaron
Amy, It was not meant to be stern and you called me last night, I was wondering why you didn't call me and tell me personally before you even wrote the blog. And at the time you were 18 and you already had good morals. So I hope there was more than the family and morals of the church that converted you. It was such a struggle with your family at the time, I hope that you went through that for more than those two things...
And I don't think it is that hard, I think we make it harder than it needs to be...like I said we spend so much time trying to talk ourselves out of believing. Justification is not a tool of Christ, yet we do it about everything. I don't have time to pray, I can't read my scriptures, I can't make it to church, why is drinking bad for me, aren't I doing good enough, I do these things right isn't ok if I don't do everything - these are just some of the ways we try to make it hard. We are literally putting off the natural man, not be persuaded by our addictions or our impulses, turning to Christ to support us and comfort us, developing and growing a close personal relationship with the Savior. I think he told us exactly how we needed to live, was it complex or punishing, no. That is the law of Moses and Christ fufilled that law. I don't think it is complex or punishing today, it is just challenging in this world we live in. He died for us, He suffered for our sins, and He lives again for us. So I will do what I can in my life so show that I am aware of his sacrifice, that I appreciate His sacrifice and love, and that I am using that gift to strengthen my relationship with Him. You don't have to be LDS to do that, my prayer is that we all can make progression in our life and someimes, that is hard, but I think the refining fires will be worth it.
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